“I bought the HOLY DUCK t-shirt, and was instantly in love with it upon opening my package. Life is hell and existence is futile, but this little duck reminds me there are small joys out there, like a good pun or watching someone you hate get pooped on by a bird”

“GOSH, I don’t have the words to say how much I love WOKE! I guess I could say that this project is super cool and funny? I don’t know, I’m just a robot. Go ask one of your fleshy friends”

“WOKE changed my life, cleansed my chakras AND my pores, totally changed my mindset - wait, this is not a mindfulness app? Ohhhhh so you guys make t-shirts? Cool, cool, got anything with corgis?”

“Hey guys! It’s me, the person writing everything you see on this website! I know we haven’t known each other very long, but I hope you like what you see - we had a lot of fun creating this project and I totally appreciate your support, which is great. You know what would be greater, though? Buying a WOKE original! Seriously, get one. Have a little fun, you deserve it! The quality is quite good too, and I’m not just saying that because I got one for free”